Teacher: Why did you not study?
Me: A year has 365 days for you to study. After taking away 52 Sundays, there are only 313 days left. There are 50 days in the summer that is way too hot to work so there are only 263 days left. We sleep 8 hours a day, in a year, that counts up to 122 days so now we're left with 141 days. If we fooled around for only 1 hour a day, 15 days are gone, so we are left with 126 days. We spend 2 hours eating each day, 30 days are used in this way in the year, and we are left with 96 days in our year. We spend 1 hour a day speaking to friends and family, that takes away 15 days more and we are left with 81 days. Exams and tests take up at least 35 days in your year, hence you are only left with 46 days. Taking off approximately 40 days of holidays, you are only left with 6 days. Say you are sick for a minimum of 3 days, you're left with 3 days in the year to study! Let's say you only go out for 2 days... You're left with 1 day! But that 1 day is your birthday!

lol mom: why is there a hispanic man scaling our balcony with a tool belt on
me: i am juliet
me: and he is my romeo
mom:
me: no, i'm just kidding please call the cops

meee pretty friend: i just got 100 likes on my photo !
athletic friend: i just beat everyone in the school at running :')
popular friend: today 5 guys asked me out lol
smart friend: just got straight A's!!
me: i can breathe

Will Smith created everything

The Cat Daddy:

The Shuffle:

The Single Ladies Dance:

The Stanky Leg:

The Cyclone:

The Dougie:

omg.

By far the greatest post to ever surface on Tumblr.

omg so true

(Source: jadeham13, via petitekindoflove)